Adult ADHD and Your Relationships
Is Adult ADHD Straining Your Relationship? 5 Warning Signs continued...
Of course, if you have ADHD you might not understand why your friends and family are getting so angry. Instead, you might feel you’re constantly being nagged or that you honestly never were told about those Saturday night dinner reservations.
2. ''You never pull your weight around here!''
Mowing the lawn. Washing the dishes. Folding clothes. Household obligations present responsibilities that can be overwhelming for people with adult ADHD.
If the people you live with are constantly complaining that you aren’t pulling your weight, take a step back and consider whether they’re right. When was the last time you took the trash out ? Is your clutter taking over the house? Are your family members doing more than their fair share of keeping the household running smoothly?
3. ''You never do what you say you’re going to do.''
You meant it when you said you’d get to your son’s basketball game by 4:30 p.m. You really did. But then you got distracted at work, and your cell phone rang, and then you realized you needed to pick up the dry cleaning. And, before you knew it, the game was over -- and you were in the dog house.
''People with ADHD very much intend to do something when they say it; it’s not like some problems where people lie or are deceitful,'' says Steven Safren, PhD, director of behavioral medicine in the department of psychiatry at Massachusetts General Hospital. ''But, sometimes in a relationship, it comes across as lying.''
4. ''How could you forget a-g-a-i-n?''
Do you feel like you’re always getting blamed for forgetting things, when you know no one actually ever told you about them?
Maybe you need to step back and reassess. Adult attention deficit hyperactivity disorder often causes people to forget things they’re told, resulting in major problems in social relationships. If people have been telling you for years that you’re forgetful, it might be time to listen and find out if they’re right.
5. ''I can’t believe you bought that -- you know we can’t afford it!''
Fights over finances are one of the most common problems for people with adult ADHD.
And one of the most common symptoms of adult attention deficit hyperactivity disorder is impulsivity. This often manifests itself as reckless spending habits, or an inability to save money, even for your child’s college fund or your retirement.