Brain & Nervous System Health Center

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Whether or not you are the main caregiver for your loved one, living and/or caring for him or her can be both rewarding and difficult. Watching someone deal with such a serious injury can be painful but also inspirational. Sharing the small and large victories can provide a shared pleasure and forge a stronger relationship. But setbacks and "bad days" can be frustrating and traumatic.

You may feel:

• Afraid that your loved one will start to have complications, such as pressure sores, and you will not be able to help.
• Afraid that you will not be able to accept or overcome disabilities and are not prepared for the responsibility of caring for someone who has an SCI.
• Depressed over losing the lifestyle you previously enjoyed with your companion.
• Worried about the costs of rehab and loss of income.
• Frustrated with your perceptions. For example, you may feel you do not have enough time for yourself, or you may just feel overwhelmed.
• Frustrated with your loved one's perceptions. For example, you may feel he or she is overly negative or worries too much about having to depend on others.

The key to working through frustrations is communication. It is important that both you and your loved one talk about what bothers you and about what your expectation are. Remember that in a sense you are in a "new" relationship: roles in your family may have changed dramatically. Discuss what you are feeling about the changes and explain them. This can help you understand each other's needs and foster a healthy relationship. Always remember that love and support are key to your loved one's recovery and to your well-being as a caregiver.