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Absurdly Grueling Workouts

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TIM GROVER'S "ATTACK" WORKOUT

Grover's clients (who include L.A. Clipper Corey Maggette) endure twenty "dumbbell grabs" (hundred-yard dashes while carrying dumbbells that increase in five-pound increments), followed by a hundred-yard bear crawl ("running" on all fours), followed by two "fireman carry" drills (fifty-yard runs while carrying a grown man). Grover's torturous regimen finishes with "object stacking," in which his clients lift stones, buckets, and ship anchors onto boxes of increasing height, from two to six feet.

Chance you'll make the Clippers' roster if you do this: 23 percent

So do this instead: "Line taps." Run ten yards, tap the ground, run back to your starting point, tap the ground again, then run fifteen yards, tap the ground, et cetera, in five-yard increments till you're at twenty-five yards. Then use five- to twenty-pound weights for twenty-yard dumbbell grabs, do a twenty-five-yard bear crawl, and carry someone smallish for two ten-yard dashes. Guaranteed results: Stronger legs (especially calves).

CINDER-BLOCK SWIMMING

Sure, it defies common sense, but swimming with cinder blocks can shave tenths of a second off your time! Olympian Gary Hall Jr., who holds the American record for the fastest fifty-meter freestyle (21.76 seconds), swims twenty-five meters underwater, resurfaces, takes one breath, grabs a standard 17.5-pound cinder block, then does another underwater lap, cinder block in arms, kicking furiously for as long as he can. He repeats this drill five times. Oh, and before he even gets in the pool, Hall does lightweight circuit training: seven reps each of bench, incline bench, upright rows, pull-ups, dips, and tricep extensions. He does three circuits, for a total of eighteen sets, with no rest.

Chance you'll drown: 41 percent

So do this instead: Swim underwater, kicking twenty times before coming up for air. Repeat five times. When that becomes easy, introduce a five-pound weight. Do the lightweight circuit just as Hall does, but replace the pull-ups with lat pull-downs.
Guaranteed results: Tighter, stronger core. And more powerful lungs.

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