Skip to content
My WebMD Sign In, Sign Up

Infertility & Reproduction Health Center

Font Size

The Baby Dilemma: Hope in a Tank


“This is it!” I whispered to myself. “This is the value of egg freezing.” For once, I didn’t have to be that anxious girl trying to beat some fertility expiration date anymore. I could simply admire a baby and wonder what mine might look like someday, the way I used to before the biological clock started. I also got to stop ruminating about where my relationship was going. (I still wanted to know, of course — just not every week.) I realized that the decision of when and whether to have kids wasn’t dependent on the wishes or acquiescence of some guy right now. It could be about — get this — the relationship. We could nail that part before bringing in kids. If it didn’t work out, I still had my eggs.

On retrieval day, my boyfriend sat with me until I was led to a table and an IV was inserted. I asked when it was going to start, but the 10-minute procedure was already over. I was slightly groggy and felt a dull soreness that would last a few days.

The clinic later sent me a picture of eight glistening blobs — those were the eggs that were good enough to freeze.

Eight was enough to make a handful of embryos, but my doctor estimated it would take 12 to 14 (fewer if you’re younger) to have a “good chance of success.”

Now, I wanted an insurance policy on my insurance policy, and I was hopeful when I heard that many women produce more eggs on different drug protocols. I resolved to find a way to pay for another cycle.

As I listed my options, I listened to my friends try to be encouraging, but I could hear a tone in their voices. It seemed to say, “How far are you going with this, Sarah?” I wanted to dismiss them as self-righteous or envious, but they all had a point. I could freeze myself right into bankruptcy, and there were still no guarantees I would take home a baby.

I got that. The surprising part was that it was starting not to matter. I’d already gotten my money’s worth. Egg freezing may not lead to babies, but it has let me put panic on the shelf and be excited about my future again. It has helped me get closer to my boyfriend and have tear-free Sunday summits about the pros and cons of parenting. It has restored my confidence that I will continue to make good, not rushed, choices.

With any luck, when I’m ready to be a parent, my eggs will work like they should. Or I’ll find another way to be a mom. But the point is, I’ll be ready.

I think I got a good deal.

Today on WebMD

female reproductive system
healthtool ovulation calculator
Low Tech Fertility Treatment
Getting Pregnant
Which Treatment Is Right For You
Conception Myths
eddleman prepare your body pregnancy
Charting Your Fertility Cycle
Fertility Specialist
Understanding Fertility Symptoms
invitro fertilization

WebMD Special Sections