The Fertility Diaries: When a Friend Is Pregnant — and You're Not
From Joy to Heartbreak
First, it was Jody and Jenny. The two brides-to-be began talking to each
other on a wedding-planning Web site in 2002, and got along so well that they
went shopping together for Jenny's wedding dress, with Jody playing
photographer. A post-shopping lunch turned into several hours of talking -- as
most of their get-togethers have ever since then. "When the two of us go
out for lunch, our husbands have learned not to expect us for dinner!" says
Jody, a 33-year-old teacher of the hearing impaired.
The two new friends' wedding dates, it turned out, were just a month apart:
Jody's in August 2003 and Jenny's in September. Jenny confided to Jody that
even before the wedding, she'd decided to stop taking her birth control pills
and start charting her ovulatory cycle, hoping to officially start trying to
get pregnant soon after becoming Mrs. Taylor.
"I had a normal length of time between periods until October,"
Jenny, 27, recalls. "But then I had what felt like the longest cycle in
history. By the time December rolled around, I had made myself an appointment
with an ob/gyn, where they told me it was perfectly normal to not get a period
for months on end." Skeptical of that glib dismissal, Jenny began to do
more research, and changed doctors.
In February, after having fertility testing, Jenny was diagnosed with
polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS), a common hormonal disorder (between 6
percent and 10 percent of childbearing-age women have PCOS) in which the ovary
doesn't make all of the hormones needed for eggs to fully mature. Jenny's new
ob/gyn advised her to lose some weight, take a drug called Metformin --
primarily used to treat type 2 diabetes, it can also restore normal menstrual
periods in women with PCOS -- and return for a follow-up appointment in
"But by June, I decided that enough was enough. I was done waiting to
get pregnant!" Jenny says. She went to a reproductive endocrinologist (an
ob/gyn who specializes in fertility treatments), and began taking her first
round of the fertility drug Clomid, which boosts hormone levels and can
kick-start ovulation, in August. "On September 9, I got a very faint
positive on a pregnancy test," Jenny recalls. "A few days later, it was
confirmed: I was pregnant!"