Is Solo Sex Hurting Your Relationship?
Wives often get upset if husbands are engaging in solo sex, such as masturbation or phone sex. But who is hurting whom?
Resolving Solo Sex Issues
Sometimes partners are so polarized on the issue of solo sex
that counseling is needed. Resolving a couple's issues around solo sex is a
process of helping them figure out what's going on in the relationship and what
it means to them, says Schnarch. "Some therapists will take the attitude
that erotica is wrong and will get involved in adjudicating proper sexual
behavior in relationships. We don't. For some couples, the issue is
growing up and realizing that when your partner masturbates the fantasies
aren't about you. For other couples it's recognizing there's a war going on
over sex in the relationship, and one person's use of erotica is either an
attack or a way of balancing out having sex withheld. There are many reasons
people look at erotica."