Skip to content
My WebMD Sign In, Sign Up

Mental Health Center

Font Size

Handling Sadness and Yearning After a Major Loss - Topic Overview

Sadness and yearning for a loved one, an object, or a way of life you have lost are the most common and expected feelings that occur after any loss.

Probably the best thing you can do to cope with your sadness and yearning is to talk about how you feel. Sharing your sadness with people who care about you helps lift the heaviness that sadness often brings. Other steps you can take to cope with your feelings of sadness and yearning include:

Recommended Related to Mental Health

A Conversation With a Columbine Survivor

Marjorie Lindholm is a survivor of the 1999 school shootings at Columbine High School in Littleton, Colo. Lindholm, who wrote a book titled A Columbine Survivor's Story, spoke with WebMD about her experiences and shares her advice for school shooting survivors and their loved ones.

Read the A Conversation With a Columbine Survivor article > >

  • Looking at photos, watching videos, or exchanging stories with other people about the object of your grief.
  • Taking part in activities that acknowledge and mark a major loss, such as funeral or memorial services after a death. These may also include activities such as a going-away party for a friend or a meeting to rebuild a community after it has been devastated by a flood.
  • Actively participating in normal day-to-day activities. Being active and taking part in daily activities keeps you focused in the present.

Although it may seem that your feelings of sadness and yearning will last forever, remind yourself that these feelings will lessen as time goes by.

Reacting to others

While grieving a loss, you may be overly sensitive and easily offended by things other people say or do. If you find yourself reacting to what other people say and do, you can:

  • Pause for a moment before responding to what you consider to be an insensitive comment or action. Concentrate on your breathing, count to 10, or recite a short prayer or poem that calms you.
  • Remind yourself that you are under stress and not acting as you normally would.
  • Ask people around you to allow you some time to adjust to your new life situation.
  • Keep yourself from becoming preoccupied with thoughts about an insensitive comment.
  • Focus on the goodness around you. Thank those who have been caring and kind to you.
1

WebMD Medical Reference from Healthwise

Last Updated: May 10, 2012
This information is not intended to replace the advice of a doctor. Healthwise disclaims any liability for the decisions you make based on this information.
Next Article:

Handling Sadness and Yearning After a Major Loss Topics

Today on WebMD

Hands breaking pencil in frustration
Quiz
Woman looking out window
Article
 
woman standing behind curtains
Article
Pet scan depression
Slideshow
 
Woman standing in grass field barefoot, wind blowi
Article
Plate of half eaten cakes
Article
 
Phobias
Slideshow
mother kissing newborn
Slideshow
 
Woman multitasking
Article
thumbnail_tired_woman_yawning
Article
 
colored pencils
VIDEO
Woman relaxing with a dog
Feature
 

WebMD Special Sections