Her eyesight steadily eroded by multiple sclerosis, Mimi now lived in a near-constant dusk. The realization came at a scary time. “I was driving. I thought, I can’t do this anymore. I had to pull off the road and let my friend drive,” says Mimi.
It can happen all of a sudden. Your vision gets dim or blurry. You can’t see colors. Your eyes hurt when you move them. It’s a condition called optic neuritis, and it’s a common problem for people living with multiple sclerosis (MS). The symptoms can seem scary, but most people recover fully, often without treatment.
Until then, Mimi had been living “in a deep state of denial” about her advancing symptoms. As her primary progressive MS forced her to hand over her car keys, she remembers, “I knew I had to start planning for a future that included this disease.”
Primary progressive MS: Uncertain futures
Tens of thousands of people in the U.S. are living with primary progressive multiple sclerosis. For them, planning for the future includes all the usual worries: raising children, planning for college, changing jobs, buying a home.
And a few more: Will I be able to walk? Can I continue to work? How will I afford all the equipment I might need? Will I end up in a nursing home?
Planning for future life with primary progressive MS isn’t for the faint of heart. But there are practical strategies for dealing with the uncertainty and challenges of this chronic condition.
Feeling “left out in the cold” with primary progressive MS
People with primary progressive MS have a different illness -- physically and emotionally -- than other MS sufferers, says Rosalind Kalb, PhD, a psychologist with the National MS Society.
“The big thing I see is they feel left out in the cold.” She’s talking about all the advances seen with other forms of MS. “It’s almost like the message is, ‘it’s not for you’ -- not the new treatments, the new research. They’re even feeling left out by health care professionals -- it’s like ‘we can’t do anything for you.’”
The experience of primary progressive MS itself is different, too. Unlike people with other forms of MS, who have attacks followed by symptom-free periods, says Kalb, people with primary progressive MS have, from the beginning, been living with a disease that steadily progresses.
There’s no “bright side” to primary progressive MS. But the absence of sudden attacks may make primary progressive MS slightly less unpredictable than other forms of MS, which can strike suddenly and severely.
“Still,” says Kalb, “just knowing you’re living with a progressive disease doesn’t tell you how fast or how far.”