Baby Boot Camp

"I'm probably the poster child for women who were shocked with parenthood, in spite of the fact that I had always wanted children. The 24-hour-a-day nature of the job really hit me hard. I had intense feelings of guilt about feeling this way, and figured that I must be a terrible mother because I didn't have those mushy, lovey feelings about my son. To this day, I still feel badly that his first few weeks were so rocky, and I often wish I could do it over again."
Jane, 33, mother of two

"The first month of Anya' life, we used to sit and hold her, breathing in her smells and marveling at this 'madly, deeply' love we felt for her. What an amazing feeling. That is something you are never really prepared for-the feeling of being so hopelessly in love with this little creature."
Karen, 28, mother of one

The early weeks of parenthood are the best of times and the worst of times all wrapped up in one exhausting yet exhilarating package. One moment you're feeling head-over-heels in love with your new baby and then the next you're mourning the loss of your prebaby life. Add to that the fact that you're likely to be sleep deprived, coping with the physical fallout of the birth, and trying to come to terms with the steep learning curve associated with parenthood, and it isn't hard to figure out why so many parents describe the early weeks of parenthood as something akin to a "boot camp" experience.

The Top 10 Reasons Why the Early Weeks of Parenthood Are Such a Challenge

As you've no doubt gathered by now, it's that "boot camp" experience that were going to be talking about in this chapter: what life after baby is really like, for better and for worse. Were going to take a David Letterman-style approach to the subject, focusing in on the top 10 reasons why the early weeks of parenthood can be such a challenge. But unlike Letterman, were going to tackle our "top 10" in ascending rather than descending order. (Hey, life is complicated enough at this point in your life without anyone expecting you to be able to count backward. So let's take it from the top!)

1. Nothing you can do ahead of time can ever really prepare you for life after baby.

Even if you do everything your prenatal instructor suggests in order to prepare yourself for the rigors of parenthood (you load up on baby-care books, sign up for "early-bird" breastfeeding classes, and spend your Saturday nights forgoing the latest romantic comedies or action flicks in favor of child safety and birth videos), chances are you'll still feel decidedly unprepared for the challenges of parenthood once your baby actually arrives. Most parents find out the hard way that there's a world of difference between their expectations of parenthood and the real enchilada.