Every parent has probably heard it at one time or another: "You're going to spoil that child!" Yet what do we really mean by spoiled child? How do you know if you have one, and what can you do to avoid spoiling one if you don't?

WebMD talked with some child development experts, and got their tips on how to spot a spoiled child. But first we learned why we may be spoiled sports for thinking some kids are spoiled.

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No Such Thing as Spoiled Children?

Most child development experts cringe at the use of the term "spoiled child."

"That's really a term from a different era," says David Elkind, PhD, a professor of child development at Tufts University and the author of The Hurried Child: Growing Up Too Fast Too Soon.

"Parents who 'spoil,' often out of the best of intentions, really want to give their children everything without their having to work for it, but the world doesn't work that way."

Why You Can't Spoil a Baby

You cannot "spoil" an infant, Elkind tells WebMD. "Infants cry when they need something and it's hard to spoil them, because they're not trying to manipulate or maneuver. In infancy, you really need to build the feeling that the world's a safe place."

Later on, he says, it's certainly possible to spoil a child by giving them too much, not setting boundaries, and not expecting them to do what's healthy for them -- but there's no spoiling a 6-month-old.

"There is so much questionable parenting literature out there that still talks about spoiling babies, that this is a myth that really needs to be addressed," agrees Peter A. Gorski, MD, director of the Lawton and Rhea Chiles Center for Healthy Mothers and Babies, and professor of public health, pediatrics, and psychiatry at the University of South Florida.

Research shows that infants whose parents respond quicker to their needs, including their cries, are happier and more independent by their first birthday, Gorski says. They learn to trust that you'll be there when they need you.

What about toddler temper tantrums? Are these children spoiled? No, says Elkind. Tantrums are simply a part of normal development. "This is a time kids are differentiating themselves and they do that by saying no," he explains. "That's normal." It doesn't mean you don't need to set limits for your toddler, or that you should always give in to him -- but saying "No no no no no!" every time you want him to get dressed or eat his lunch doesn't mean he's spoiled. It just means he's 2.

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