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10 Ways to Make Your Relationship More Thrilling

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4. Be a little daring

When I was in high school the "in" thing to do during the wee hours of a warm summer night was to sneak into the local pool and go skinny-dipping. Fear of getting caught in a compromising position is guaranteed to evoke some thrills and chills, and you can bring back that feeling as adults in small ways that won't get you thrown in the slammer. How, you ask? The next time the two of you go to a movie, hide in the last row of the theater and fool around. Valerie Gordon, 35, of Santa Clara, CA, ups the excitement factor by showing (more than) a little skin: "When the mood hits and the weather permits, my husband and I take naughty photos of each other in public places like parking garages."

5. Relive your first date

Your first date was a mystery that had yet to be solved. There were several juicy clues -- the look in your date's eyes, the way he kissed you -- and plenty of nervous tension. But even though you know how that mystery turned out, returning to the scene of that first crime can bring back some of those old goosebumps. Sharon Alex, 38, of Lake Mary, FL, suggests you plan the evening exactly as you did the first time -- same perfume, same innocent looks, everything. You can even dress separately and meet each other there, as Alex did: "I met my husband at a nightclub, and we danced and flirted. His arm around my waist made everything seem just right."

6. Cyber-romance each other

These days it's far too easy for a chasm of cyberspace to grow between a husband and wife. He can spend hour after hour playing a computer game, and she can't seem to get enough of her favorite blogs. But with a few quick clicks, you can use this very same technology to hot-wire your marriage. "With the accessibility of email," says Michele Weiner-Davis, a marriage and family therapist in Woodstock, IL, and author of Divorce Busting, "we can take the time to do things we wouldn't ordinarily do, like sending love letters." One woman she knows decided that if her husband was going to spend all of his time surfing the Internet, she would express her feelings online. She emailed him a very personal romantic poem and got an amazingly romantic response.

7. See each other in a different light

Kristen Kiser, 30, of Astoria, NY, and her husband add a spark to their marriage by hosting Thanksgiving dinner for friends who can't make it home for the holiday. "I get to see what Marc's like in action, when he's taking charge and acting the host," she says. "It makes me fall in love with him all over again." Says Los Angeles psychotherapist Suzanne Lopez, author of Get Smart with Your Heart, "Seeing your partner with different eyes has to do with letting go of preconceived ideas. It can really change the energy in a relationship for the better." Other eye-opening ideas: Consider taking a boxing class together at the gym, where you both might be a bit more wild and aggressive than usual, or dance lessons, where you might surprise each other with your grace.

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