5 Things Super-Happy Couples Do Every Day
We asked happy couples across the United States to tell us about
marriage-strengthening solutions they've developed. Try your hand at
incorporating a few into your daily life and maybe you can be as ridiculously,
embarrassingly, revoltingly happily married as I am.
Want to know the one thing that's most important to a successful marriage?
That's easy. Walk up to your husband and surprise him with this one-question
You: "Honey, what do you think is the one thing most important to a
Him: "Umm, uh did you say something?"
And, well, there you have it.
Happily married couples typically say their relationships work better when they
can sit down and gab one-on-one, like thinking, feeling adults. But who's got
time for that? Actually, anybody who sleeps at night, if you follow the lead of
Julie and Thom and their nightly visits to their "igloo."
"It all started one winter night years ago, when Julie had had a really
bad day," says Thom, 33, a marketing director in Columbus, Ohio. "We
were huddled under the covers of our bed, and Julie was describing how all the
people who made her day miserable were 'bad polar bears' and how she didn't
want any of the bad polar bears coming into the bedroom and how the bed was our
refuge from them. You realize how embarrassing it is to admit this, right?
Anyway, that's when we started calling the bed the igloo."
"The igloo is a place to retreat to," says Julie, 31. "It's our
little sanctuary; only nice things happen in the igloo."
Eventually Julie and Thom began holding a powwow in the igloo at the end of
every day, making a nightly excursion that Julie says has become a vital part
of their five-year marriage.
"It's funny, because I always thought that when you lived with somebody,
you'd automatically know everything that was going on," she says. "But
we find that if we don't take that time to connect with each other, it's really
easy for life to get in the way. The igloo offers one of the few times in the
day where there's not a whole heck of a lot else going on, so you're able to
focus on each other in a deeper way."