5 Things Super-Happy Couples Do Every Day
Of course, you don't need to christen major pieces of furniture with cute
nicknames to improve the communication in your marriage. You simply have to set
aside a few minutes every day to remind each other of why you got married in
the first place. And there are as many ways to do that as there are marriages
Lori and Joe, who are happily married in Philadelphia, have a nightly ritual
they call crook time. That's when Lori cuddles up in the "crook" of
Joe's shoulder and they talk. "The name's a little sappy," Lori admits,
"but it's always a nice way for us to catch up."
Every night, Angie and Bob walk their pet Chihuahua, Chachi, through the
streets of Brookline, Massachusetts. In addition to keeping Chachi from picking
dogfights he could never win ("He has a bit of a Napoleon complex," Bob
says), they use the time to strengthen their 11-year marriage.
It may be going a bit far to emulate Tim and Jill, a Connecticut couple who
somewhat sheepishly admit that they check in with each other from work
"six, maybe seven times a day," Tim says, "sometimes a dozen times
when we're really being crazy." (Jill says, slightly more defiantly,
"He's just my best friend, and our marriage is a great partnership, and
there's no one I'd rather talk to.")
Then again, if you've been married 10 years and still want to talk to each
other 10 times a day, you must be doing something right.
Back when you were 14 years old, you probably figured that once you got
married, you'd have sex just about every day. (Well, maybe teenage girls don't
think that way. But let me tell you, 14-year-old boys sure do.) And why not?
Sex is free. It's fun. And it doesn't require the purchase of any equipment,
besides the occasional bottle of vegetable oil and about 20 feet of nylon
But as they get older, most couples realize that having sex every night
isn't possible, let alone a worthy goal. Indeed, a 1994 University of Chicago
survey of Americans' sexual habits found that only about a third of adults have
sex more than once a week. Granted, that number might have been higher if all
the couples having sex more frequently had stopped to take the surveyor's phone
call, but clearly, sex for most married couples is far from a daily