Love Lessons Ripped from the Headlines
By Dan Bova
Love-life advice...from celebrities? The experts on
red-carpet make-out sessions, tabloid feuds, and messy divorces? Nope, it's not
a joke — read on for some star-studded romantic wisdom.
One glance at the nearest supermarket checkout rack and it's clear that our
obsession with celebrities' love lives knows no limits. From their first
meetings (at fabulous Hollywood parties or on blind dates set up by their
agents) to their starry-eyed proposals and six-figure weddings, followed
(inevitably, it seems) by their stormy divorces, we can't get enough.
And it's not just that we love hearing the juicy details -- we really care
about what happens to our favorite and not-so-favorite couples. Our hearts
break a little when a good-seeming thing (like Reese Witherspoon and Ryan
Phillippe) falls apart, and we shake our heads and think, Told you so, when a
train wreck of a relationship (we won't name names) meets its preordained
This cultural obsession with the loves of the rich and famous may seem more
heated than ever in our lightning-speed Internet age, but it's nothing new,
says Jake Halpern, author of Fame Junkies. "We've always been
taken with these kinds of stories -- it goes back to Greek mythology, where
people would follow the sex romps of the all-powerful Zeus," he says.
"Celebrities are our modern mythology -- we find what they do fascinating
and we draw examples from it."
Which isn't to say they set good examples: A third marriage at 30?
Participating in a reality show that will showcase every crack in your
relationship to the masses? Declaring eternal love for a virtual stranger from
the cover of a magazine? Celebrities have done it all, and while they don't
always appear to learn from their mistakes, that doesn't mean we can't.
Here, the wisdom we can gather from the misfires -- and, yes, the occasional
triumphs -- of our larger-than-life counterparts.
#1: Protect Your Relationship from the Outside World
Thanks to reality TV, there are countless examples of couples that have opted
to share a little TMI (too much information) with the public, from basic bodily
functions (hello, Nick Lachey and Jessica Simpson) to the pouty
he-said-she-said of every little fight.
Britney Spears's Chaotic, which followed her romance with K-Fed
from its lusty beginnings through their wedding day, sure lived up to its
title, but it also could have been called Inappropriate. (Did we
really need to hear her rave, "Our sex is soooo good" to a makeup
And we've all seen way too many celeb couples gush about each other in
interviews -- only to implode months or weeks (even days) later.
Essentially, the louder a couple shouts their love from the rooftops, the
more quickly it seems to disintegrate.