Moderator: Our guest is Michael Webb, theauthor of "The
RoMANtic Guide." To say our guest is an expert onromance would be an
understatement. He is editor and founder of The RoMANticNewsletter and
TheRomantic.com Web site. His popular syndicated column,"The RoMANtic,"
is read worldwide by millions. He is also theofficial romance expert and
spokesman for I Can't Believe It's Not Butter'sLove2K Tour. Today, he's here to
answer your questions about making romance adaily experience in your life, not
just a once a year Valentine's blip on yourlove radar. So, let's get to the
Question from Daisy: My husband has been traveling alot
with his work lately. How can we keep the romance alive long-distance?
Men don't like to talk about it; neither do their partners. But loss of
libido in men or inhibited sexual desire stresses a marriage more than any
other sexual dysfunction, according to Barry McCarthy, co-author of
Rekindling Desire: A Step by Step Program to Help Low-Sex and No-Sex
Losing interest in sex may not be as common an occurrence for men as it is
for women: It affects about 15% to 16% of men, and at least double that many
women. "But when men lose interest in sex it...
Michael Webb : One thing I like to do when I'mtraveling is
to get several of my wife's favorite childhood books or poetrybooks, and read
to her each night for just a couple of minutes. In addition,someone who's
traveling can try to pick up little mementos all throughout thetrip. It can be
as simple as a matchbook from a restaurant, a business cardfrom a place you've
visited, or a brochure. And when you get home you can takethe time through
these small items to share memories about the trip.
Moderator: It's probably safe to say manypeople (especially
men) intertwine romance and sex. How do we make romance anexpression of love
and not an invitation to sex?
Michael Webb: Excellent question. In today'ssociety, there
very much is that confusion, and I try to draw the line in mywork that romance
should be completely unselfish. And sex by its nature isoften a selfish thing
because you are trying to get something in return. Sowhen you are thinking
about romance you need to completely think about thewarmth, needs, and desire
of the other person -- and not be considering 'what'sin it for me? '
Moderator: Judging bythe title of your book, I would guess
men need more romance advice than women.Why are guys so bad at being
Michael Webb: I think it's often the way we arebrought up.
In today's society, 50% of us are probably coming from brokenfamilies, and the
majority of that time we are living with our mothers. Sothere are very few
romantic role models on the men's side. Therefore, bookslike mine and other
material are often invaluable to men and women too, whodidn't grow up learning
how to be romantic.
Moderator: It seems a daunting task to findnew ways to be
romantic. How do you keep from feeling like you always have totop your last
Michael Webb: When you don't think of romancein terms of
size or money, then being romantic is no longer that sort ofchallenge to
yourself. Romance is really made up of all the little things thatyou do.