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    Putting the 'Man' into 'Romance'

    Keeping Love Alive


    Question from Bradcaskanette: Scheduledromance seems to be fine; it's just getting the fire going...

    Michael Webb: You will often find that once youbegin practicing romantic things the fire will come soon afterward. The mistakepeople make is that they wait for the fire to be there before they feel likedoing something romantic for their partner.

    Moderator: Especially for couples thathaven't been together very long, one person's idea of romance may be perceivedas embarrassing, suffocating, or even threatening by the other. How muchromance is too much? And how do you gauge that for your own partner?

    Michael Webb: You need to be aware of yourpartner's reactions when you do something romantic. If they are somewhatho-hum, either your approach was incorrect or they're not that needy in theromantic arena. But statistically 95% of women can't get enough romance. Soit's that rare person who feels overwhelmed by continual romantic gestures.

    Moderator: Do you recommend romanticgestures on a first, second, or third date? What's appropriate?

    Michael Webb: Romance again has very little todo with sex. So romance really is about letting the other person know that theyare special. And of course, the degree to which you make that known isimportant. You don't want to be giving the impression that you are deeply inlove with them if you really don't even know them yet. But you can certainlylet them get the feeling that you care about them.

    Moderator: You mentioned that a very highpercentage of women are insatiable romantics; here's a question about the guys:

    Question from GIVEMEURLUV: Do most guys enjoy beingpampered with flowers and love notes, or do they find that corny?

    Michael Webb: Most guys, surprisingly, enjoygetting flowers and love notes. Although not all of them would admit it toother men. But perhaps one of the best romantic overtures for men is with food.

    Moderator: Now you're talking!

    Michael Webb: A special cake, their favoritebrownies, recreating grandmother's lasagna recipe -- those sort of things arehighly romantic for men. Because men really appreciate experiences more thanthings.

    Question from Lillie: Tastes and scents are recalledfor years.

    Michael Webb: When you are planning romanticexperiences, take consideration of the five senses. And the more senses thatyou can involve, the greater chance that this romantic idea of yours will belong remembered and cherished.

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