The Starter Husband
After graduating from college, Andi jetted off to culinary school in Paris,
then switched to journalism, where she climbed the ranks, moving from one
semiglamorous job to the next — all the while hooking up, dating, dumping, and
moving on. She's a perfectly modern gal, a gorgeous mess of neuroses and
contradictions — the kind who never pictured herself married by 27, divorced by
28, and remarried with two toddlers at 35.
But along the way, she met Tucker. "He was what I was supposed to marry.
He was what everybody else in my life wanted for me and what the world tells
you you're supposed to want," she says. "I got sucked into the idea. I
was in my 20s, and I felt like there was so much pressure from my family to
find the perfect person. I just felt like, God, I'd be stupid if I didn't do
Within months of promising to love and honor and cherish Tucker forever, she
knew she had made a huge mistake. The problem? He was boring. "Wholly
uncomplicated," as she puts it. The kind of guy who reads Tom Clancy books
on the couch and watches Adam Sandler movies while dreaming of white-picket
fences. Going to depressing French movies, leapfrogging over the less ambitious
on the company ladder — those were the things that excited Andi. "The idea
of spending my life with someone like that seemed stifling," she says.
"It finally just got to me that he was so ... sunny."
I hoist my drink in that you-go-girl kind of way, but I'm struck by her
casual disregard for the institution. Marriage used to be a big deal. How could
she slip in and out of it so easily? She'd plodded along for nearly 12 months,
passive-aggressively avoiding her relationship by consuming herself with the
restaurant openings and black-tie benefits that were part of her job. But then
Tucker started talking about having children. "To me, once you have kids,
you can't get out," she says. "When he began asking about a family, I
felt like that was too final of a commitment. That's when I had to say,
"Okay, I've got to fish or cut bait here.'"