By Jessie Knadler
Looking for a relationship pick-me-up? All you need is a spoonful of sugar.
“It’s easy to feel embarrassed or shy about being sweet to each other,
especially in our cynical, hard-edged culture,” says REDBOOK Love Network
expert Tina B. Tessina, Ph.D., author of The Commuter Marriage. “But
adding sweetness to your words and actions is the best thing you can do to
bring positive energy to your relationship, which makes everything else
easier.” Bonus: It’s human nature to copy...
Getting caught during a delicate moment, whether you’re solo or with a partner, is common.
“It’s best to address your embarrassment head-on,” says Carole Lieberman, MD, a psychiatrist in Beverly Hills. A light response can work wonders -- something like, “Oh, I thought I was going to have some private time here,” or, “We thought we were alone.”
Get caught by your kids? “Young children, in particular, may interpret sexual situations as Mommy and Daddy fighting, so it’s important to quickly let your child know that you are playing,” says Lieberman. Older children are more clued into what’s going on and respond better to, "We were showing our love for each other, and you'll understand better when you grow up.”
Your Partner Has a Fetish
If your partner makes a freaky request, ask yourself: Are you ashamed to do it? Is it unsafe? If the answer is no to both, “it’s worthwhile to be open-minded and willing to try it,” Lieberman says.
Before you start, discuss what it is you don’t like about the idea, and consider having a "safe word" that lets your partner know it’s time to stop. Knowing you can call a halt when you want to may even help you enjoy it.