What Men Really Want But Won't Tell You
By Dan Bova
Straight from the mouths of the guys themselves — it turns
out what they crave is simpler, sweeter, and more surprising than you'd ever
imagine. Here, our guy spills their not-so-dirty secrets.
"A full shelf just for us in the medicine cabinet."
Not a two-inch-wide slot -- a whole, wall-to-wall shelf. Rescuing our razor
from an avalanche of lipstick, Secret sticks, and those triangle sponge
thingies is not the most fun way to start the morning. And by the way, what the
hell are those triangle things for? Are you playing blocks in there?
"You waking us up in the middle of the night...completely
There are two things every dude in a long-term relationship desires: excitement
and nudity. And with this little move, you're killing two naughty birds with
one sexy stone. Wake us up at 3 a.m. and tell us that you just had the hottest
dream and can't fall back to sleep. Then watch the fog of sleep -- along with
other things -- suddenly lift. "Naked is the best thing ever in bed, along
with maybe pizza," says Bob Rybarczyk, 37, who lives in St. Louis. "The
spontaneity of being woken up like that is what makes it exciting, assuming I
could actually be coherent in the middle of the night." And who knows, your
adventurousness might just inspire us to new heights of under-the-covers
creativity in return.
"A free pass to skip some boring get-together."
We think your family is great. Really. How could we have anything less than
affection for your brothers, sisters, and, of course, your parents, the people
who raised the woman we love and adore? But here's the thing: We also love and
adore lying on the couch, when the only sounds in the house are a televised
baseball game and our snores. It's nothing personal, but a Saturday afternoon
of pure vegetation, as opposed to making small talk at your niece's birthday
party, would be the greatest gift ever. "My wife once told my in-laws that
I had a stomach flu the day of a big family barbecue," says my brother,
Rich, 36, from Miller Place, NY. "I felt like I was playing hooky -- it was
the best! As a thank you, I didn't complain about being dragged along on her
epic mall shopping trips for months after that."
"More girls' nights out."
Yep, you heard us right -- because when you go out with your best buddies, you
recharge your batteries, blow off some steam, and come home a happy camper. And
when you're happy, we're happy. (Plus, we all know what a few cosmos do to you
when the lights click off. Growl!) And, okay, on a much less charitable note,
it gives us much-needed ammunition for that "Can I spend the weekend with
my buddies in Vegas?" request we'll be making in a few months.