Guidelines for Your Child's Bedtime
How to Make It Easier for Your Child (and You!) to Get Sound Sleep
6. Routine, routine, routine. Kids love it, they thrive on it, and it works. Routines set expectations and help train behavior; a nightly bedtime routine helps your child learn to be sleepy, just like reading in bed may put some of us adults to sleep (even when we're out of bed). The structure of bedtime routines also associates the bedroom with good feelings and provides a sense of security and control. Routines can take the stress out of bedtime and help make it a special time, especially if you have more than one child.
This is a time to wind down. So calming activities, like taking a bath, reading a story, or perhaps a gentle massage are good choices. Keep TVs, computers, and the like out of the bedroom, because they can arouse your child and keep her up later.
Let your child know what the routine is, including the time limits involved, and stick to them. It is often very helpful to give notice that time is almost up, like, "We have just three more pages of our story," but be firm and do not go past your limit. Uncertainty breeds tension, and arguments may follow. A key goal in any routine is teaching your child to soothe herself so that she may fall asleep unassisted and put herself back to sleep unassisted when she awakens at night. Key to achieving this goal is for parents to leave their child alone long enough for her to go to sleep.
7. Dress and room temperature. Again, there are no absolutes here, but a rule of thumb is to dress your child basically as you dress yourself, keeping in mind that younger children often kick off the covers at night and are unable to cover themselves. People generally sleep better in a cooler (but not cold) rather than warmer room.
8. Transitional object. Bedtime means separation, and that can be made easier with a transitional object, like a doll, teddy bear, blanket, or the like. This kind of object can provide a sense of security and control that comforts and reassures your child.
9. Room and bed sharing. Some parents may feel sharing their bedroom and/or bed with their child is more natural than having separate rooms, that it is important for emotional development. There may be cultural preferences as well.
From the point of view of obtaining uninterrupted sleep and considering various social and psychological issues, it is generally not a good idea. First, everyone sleeps better alone -- that is, we have fewer sleep disturbances and awakenings. Children in the same bed and/or bedroom also may not learn how to fall asleep themselves and tend to have sleep problems. Smothering is also a concern.