How to Get Your Sexy Back
Sexiness isn't something you just turn on and off. You have to cultivate it, get in touch with your body. Once you tap in to your sensuality, a great sex life -- and a positive new outlook -- are just around the corner.
1. Focus on the last time. Taking just five minutes out of your busy
day to replay the specifics of your last really great sexual encounter will
whet your appetite, says Gail Saltz, Ph.D., the author of The Ripple Effect: How Better Sex Can Lead to a Better
Life. Think about your pleasure: how it made you feel — and how you
want to feel that way again.
2. Touch yourself. (No, we don't mean that way, but that's not
a bad idea either.) Take the time after a hot shower to massage your body with
lotion, instead of just slapping it on. Or give yourself a relaxing neck rub.
"I brush my skin with a soft brush every morning when I wake up," says Mary
McGuire-Wien, of New York City. "It makes my skin feel much more alive."
3. Watch something hot. Does Brad Pitt do it for you? Be sure to add
Troy to your Netflix queue. Or the movie that you and your husband saw
on your fifth date... and didn't quite make it all the way through. Women are
visual creatures (just like men), and when you give your eyes a sensual treat,
it will reignite your flames of desire.
4. Throw away the Victoria's Secret catalogue. Comparing yourself to
unrealistic body ideals is a surefire way to feel unsexy. Remove these images
from your life as much as you possibly can (as in, turn off The Bachelor
and all those size 0 bikini bodies). When you do see them, remind yourself that
these body types are un-attainable. And that yours is just fine, thank you very
5. Ditch the sweats. "If sweats have become your standard after-work
uniform, then you are unlikely to feel sexy," says Sari Locker, the author of
The Complete Idiot's Guide to Amazing Sex. You don't
have to wear fishnets, "but buy some clothes that make you feel sexy when
you're lounging, even if that's just a silky camisole and leggings."
6. Get away. Take a walk or plan a girls' night out. "When I do
something just for me, it's easier to remember who I was before I was a wife
and mom," says Megan Barner, of Charlotte, NC. "After I spend time with
friends, my husband says I come back a new woman."