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How to Get Your Sexy Back

Sexiness isn't something you just turn on and off. You have to cultivate it, get in touch with your body. Once you tap in to your sensuality, a great sex life -- and a positive new outlook -- are just around the corner.

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2. Touch yourself. (No, we don't mean that way, but that's not a bad idea either.) Take the time after a hot shower to massage your body with lotion, instead of just slapping it on. Or give yourself a relaxing neck rub. "I brush my skin with a soft brush every morning when I wake up," says Mary McGuire-Wien, of New York City. "It makes my skin feel much more alive."

3. Watch something hot. Does Brad Pitt do it for you? Be sure to add Troy to your Netflix queue. Or the movie that you and your husband saw on your fifth date... and didn't quite make it all the way through. Women are visual creatures (just like men), and when you give your eyes a sensual treat, it will reignite your flames of desire.

4. Throw away the Victoria's Secret catalogue. Comparing yourself to unrealistic body ideals is a surefire way to feel unsexy. Remove these images from your life as much as you possibly can (as in, turn off The Bachelor and all those size 0 bikini bodies). When you do see them, remind yourself that these body types are un-attainable. And that yours is just fine, thank you very much.

5. Ditch the sweats. "If sweats have become your standard after-work uniform, then you are unlikely to feel sexy," says Sari Locker, the author of The Complete Idiot's Guide to Amazing Sex. You don't have to wear fishnets, "but buy some clothes that make you feel sexy when you're lounging, even if that's just a silky camisole and leggings."

6. Get away. Take a walk or plan a girls' night out. "When I do something just for me, it's easier to remember who I was before I was a wife and mom," says Megan Barner, of Charlotte, NC. "After I spend time with friends, my husband says I come back a new woman."

7. Exercise. There are a million reasons to hit the gym — lose weight, lower stress — but the best one is to boost your sexiness. Sweat releases endorphins, giving you a natural high. "When I feel low, I hit the gym," says Jaime Sarrio, of Nashville. "I feel strong and sexy after a run on the treadmill or a weight-lifting session."

8. Get nostalgic. Joanne Rock, of Peru, NY, creates lustful playlists that remind her of when she was falling in love with her husband. "Hearing those tunes sends my thoughts to sexy places," she says. Or take out photos from when you two first started dating. Remember that wanton lust that overcame both of you? Trust us, it's still there.

9. Make your most beautiful feature pop. Play up your eyes with a new eyeliner, or try a different gloss on your lips. Or, if you normally go natural, put on a little concealer. "When you feel beautiful, you feel sensual," says Debbie Mandel, the author of Turn On Your Inner Light. Take the extra three or four minutes to primp yourself and feel pretty — just for you.

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