Is Your Kid Too Busy?

Your child may not tell you they feel overwhelmed with activities and school work. But headaches or stomachaches could be signs that they are feeling stressed. Are they not eating well? Are they moodier than usual? Not sleeping so well?   

 

It may be time to cut back on some commitments. Sit down with them and map things on a family calendar so you can see how much is going on. Decide together which activities are more important and then limit them to a few days a week.

Kids should have at least a little time every day when they can do anything -- or nothing. Encourage your child to read, listen to (or make) music, ride a bike, or take a walk -- whatever helps them recharge their batteries.  No matter how old they are, kids need time to relax.

 

And TV, video games, and computer time don’t count as relaxation. Work with your child to limit their screen time to less than 2 hours a day.

It depends on the kid, but between homework and activities, kids have been having less and less free time since the early '80s.  If your child is already super busy, think twice before they add on another sport, lesson, or club.

 

Along with time to recharge during the day, you should make sure your child has enough time to settle in for a good night’s sleep. Help them make time to do something relaxing, like a warm bath or reading, before lights out.

If your laid-back kid is suddenly hyper or your well-behaved child now causes trouble, it could be stress. A change in behavior can mean there's too much going on and your kid is having trouble handling it.

 

Help them deal with stress in a healthy way -- taking walks, listening to music, or doing yoga can work well.

Playing sports or a musical instrument can help a child get better grades. But the simple act of eating dinner together at home seemed to better predict whether kids would have higher scores in school, according to one study.

 

So while it may be tempting to pile on the extracurriculars to help your kid get ahead, the answer is to slow down! Schedule family dinners whenever you have a night without practices or meetings.

Keep a family calendar of everyone's commitments. There should be some days without anything on the schedule. Let everyone have some free time. Having time to recharge and relax is part of living a healthy life.

Forcing kids to "stick with it" doesn’t always teach perseverance or commitment.  It may set them up for a lifetime of overcommitting.

 

Learning how to balance activities and school is an important life skill, too. Talk to your child about why they want to quit an activity. If their grades or well-being are at stake, consider letting them drop out.

 

Next time, help make sure they know what they are getting into before they sign up. If they know what to expect before they start, it also may make them more likely to stick with it.