Sexual Desire Problems -- What You Can Do

Self-Care at Home

Treatment is not needed for all sexual problems. Some problems can be solved by you and your partner alone with a little openness and creativity.

  • Some problems go away by themselves over time--patience and understanding are all that is required.
  • Sometimes talking the problem out with your partner is enough. Women who learn to tell their partners about their sexual needs have a better chance of having a satisfying sex life.
  • Try to make the solution fun -- think up ways to inject a little romance and excitement into your sexual routine.

Some strategies women use to overcome sexual problems:

  • Set aside time to be alone or alone with your partner, without children and other distractions.
  • Use erotic videos or books to increase arousal.
  • Masturbate to learn about what increases your arousal.
  • Fantasize about what arouses you sexually; if appropriate, tell your partner about these fantasies. Use sensual massage and other forms of touch.
  • Try new sexual positions or scenarios.
  • Use relaxation techniques such as a warm bath before having sex.
  • Use a vaginal lubricant to relieve arousal problems due to vaginal dryness.

Several excellent books are available in mainstream bookstores or from mail-order sources to help couples deal with sexual and communication problems. Many people prefer this "do-it-yourself" method to talking about these problems with an outsider.