Preparing for Pregnancy Emotionally

Ask anyone with a newborn, and they will tell you that it changes everything. And while it is literally impossible to be completely prepared for all the emotional changes that come with baby, a little forethought goes a long way, says Frank A. Chervenak, MD, the professor and chairman of the department of obstetrics and gynecology at Weill Medical College of Cornell University in New York.

A woman considering pregnancy needs to think about whether there are other children in the home and what age they will be when the newborn comes home, he says. Can she handle two young children very close in age? She must also consider her job. "If she is going through a stressful or demanding time at work, how will pregnancy and having a baby impact on her work?" he says.

"In broad strokes, a woman must weigh how a pregnancy would impact her family, her work, and her own psyche," he says. "Is she ready or would she rather wait?" All of these are factors that a woman should consider, and she is the final arbiter."

Research reinforces the importance of forethought. Studies have shown that couples who have thought carefully about all the details of physically having a baby -- from choosing a doctor to weighing the risks involved -- are much more prepared than their counterparts who have not given it as much thought. For example, one study in the April 2000 issue of the Journal of Personality found that women who had given a great deal of thought to what parenting may entail were better adjusted as moms, compared with new moms who did not think as deeply about the demands their new role as a parent would place upon their lives.

"Personal readiness, how a new baby will impact the family, the couple, and work are the overwhelming factors to consider in advance," he says.