Fertility Diaries: They Dreamed of Motherhood Together
As the poignant anniversaries of Andrew's birth and death passed, Jenny found herself wishing that more people would talk to her about her son. "It seemed like people had forgotten him for the most part, or at least they didn't remember his birthday and angel day," she says. Some close family members did remember, though, with flowers on Andrew's grave and words of comfort for Jenny and Sean. And Jody and Carrie sent flowers to arrive on Andrew's angel day. "We just wanted to let her know we're thinking of her — we're not going to forget his dates," says Carrie. "She doesn't want people to forget him, like it never happened or he wasn't real — when he was."
Jenny and Sean have pledged to make sure that their son is always real in the heart of the little sister he never met. "We already talk to Nora about him and point out pictures of him," says Jenny. "Obviously she doesn't grasp it now, and it will probably be years before she can really understand, but we will always tell her about him."
Lessons in Motherhood
Jenny was fortified during these tough days by a long, chatty lunch at Applebee's with Jody and Carrie on the day before Andrew's birthday. "We took over the place — there was baby stuff everywhere," laughs Jody. Carrie brought her daughter, Payton, then 10 weeks old, much to the delight of little Nora. "She was just enthralled with Payton," Jody recalls. "She constantly wanted to play with her stuff and look at her. It was so cute!"
New mom Carrie and mom-to-be Jody grilled Jenny about everything from what to buy for the baby (and what not to buy) to breast-feeding tips. She advised them to invest in the real "Hooter Hider" for nursing in public instead of skimping on cheap imitations. "It's so nice and reassuring to have a friend who's gone through it so recently — someone you can ask anything," says Carrie. "My sisters didn't breast-feed, so I'm always saying, 'Jenny, help, is this normal? Jenny, what should I do?'"