Breaking the Silence of Migraine

While pain is universal, when it comes to migraines, no two patients are exactly alike. They're as unique as their triggers, symptoms, and treatments. Here now, in our series "In Their Own Words, Moving Beyond Migraine," patients describe in vivid detail what their migraines look like, feel like, and sound like. OK, is this good? Camera A, Camera B rolling. And I'm looking right into this camera? All right. Oh boy. Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry. As long as I look good, that's fine. [LAUGHTER] My name is Zach [INAUDIBLE]. My name is Melissa [INAUDIBLE]. My name is Mary [INAUDIBLE]. My name is Sarah Shaw. I'm 32. I am 28 years old. I am 46 years old. I'm 27 years old. I have been fighting migraines since-- I can remember as young as eight, my mom remembers as young as like, five. Nearly all of my life since I was four years old. For the past four years. I've had it for over 20 years. What does my migraine feel like? It's hard to explain to someone that's never experienced it. Because it's so much more than just having a headache, which is what I think a lot of people think of a migraine. It feels as though there's a drill going through my left eye, that's just constantly drilling. It goes all the way straight through to the back of my head. Sometimes it'll start in the back of my head, and just sort of grip there, and then move forward. It's like someone is drumming on my brain. A very sharp, long ice pick being jabbed right into my eye. Like a cement roller is rolling over my head. I see a lot of squiggly lines, and different visual disturbances. Light is terrible. There is this temporary blindness that happens in my right eye, where I can't see out of it for about 15 to 20 minutes. I don't lose my sight completely. The best way to describe it is it's like being drunk. You know, you go blurry. Hearing like a rush of sound in my head, and not being able to handle lights, and needing to lie down. It's almost like vertigo. My ears ring quite a bit. I really can't hear. [ELECTRONIC TONE] Let me start off by saying what haven't I tried to treat my migraines. All the triptans, I think I've been through, Relpax, sumatriptan, rizatriptan. If it is supposed to help, I've tried it. I went to a specialist who put lidocaine up my nose. I have an injection medication that I take, where I inject it into my leg when I have a migraine episode. I've been hospitalized twice to try week-long treatments that didn't have any effect. After the last hospitalization-- the treatment that I tried-- I really just felt like, OK, I just need to figure out how to live with this now. I can't stand another person saying that they're going to help me when it's just not going to work. Migraines have really forced me to miss out on the past three years, half of any social interactions, and family interactions and me, just personal enjoyment time. I'm always having to kind of rearrange my schedule and plans around my pain. I ended up going to the hospital the night before my birthday. And what was supposed to be a one-night treatment turned into a week. And I ended up spending my 25th birthday in the hospital. I went to a specialty inpatient clinic for nine days. That was the first time the Pirates made the playoffs in 20 years. I was watching it alone in a hospital bed in Chicago by myself. How I live with this condition-- it is like a relationship. It's like a very bad relationship that I've had for a long time. I know eventually, there's going to be a good day. And that's just what I live for. One thing that I want people to know who have never had a migraine, or who know me who don't know that I have migraines, is that I'm trying my best. It's something that we have to live with all the time, and typically, hide. If someone tells you that they have a migraine, that they're constantly experiencing this, believe them. It's not something that we're doing because we want to get out of seeing you, or get out of work, or just stay home and lay around. Even if I look like I'm happy on the inside, 90% of the time, I am probably having a migraine attack. I've never once have faked having a headache. But I fake being well every single day. The pain is a part of who I am. Would I like to live without it? Absolutely. But yeah, it's part of me. I'm going to keep fighting it. Are migraines impacting your life? You can go to WebMD.com/migraine to assess your approach to managing them. You are going to get personalized strategies for living better that you can discuss with your doctor.