When you have stage III or stage IV breast cancer, there’s more to taking care of yourself than your treatments and doctor visits. Little things that you can do at home can help you feel your best. Try these ways to make your everyday life more comfortable and simpler.

Some women get hot flashes as a side effect of breast cancer treatments that lower their estrogen levels. If this happens to you, you’ll want to have a fan in your bedroom and layers on your bed, so you can remove them as needed. You might also want to keep a towel near your bed, if you sweat a lot.

Does it have alcohol in it? If so, you might want to switch to an alcohol-free version. Chemo and radiation can sometimes cause mouth sores, and the alcohol would irritate those spots.  Hard candy (not too tart) and ice chips made from plain water or frozen juice are good to have on hand to soothe such sores.

If you go to a hospital or clinic for chemo, you’ll be there for at least a couple of hours each time. It will probably be cold there, so bring a blanket you love, socks, snacks, lip balm (in case the chemo dries out your lips), and water. Load up on books and music to help you pass the time. 

When you need to take a break, make a beeline for a chair where you can bask in the sun, or to a central room of your house so you feel close to your family. Look for a strategic place that’s close to a bathroom and doesn’t have a lot of stairs, if moving around isn’t so easy. To feel settled, keep favorite photos nearby and have a chair ready for people who visit.

Your diet can help you keep up your strength and curb any side effects from treatment. Choose foods like vegetables, fruits, whole grains, and lean protein. Keep items like nuts, raisins, and string cheese handy for snacking. When you feel well enough, cook extra portions of healthy meals and freeze them. These will be easy to defrost and eat on days when you don’t have time or energy to cook.

Music can help you feel calm or boost your energy. You can listen to an album you like, play an instrument you have at home, sing along to the radio, or watch an online concert. Even talking with friends about your favorite song lyrics and what they mean to you may help you feel better.

Want a place where you can talk about your feelings, share your concerns, and get advice from others who are going through the same experience as you? You might want to find a support group. Some meet in medical centers or churches.  Others meet online, so you can join in from the comfort of your own home.

Friends and family will probably ask, “Can I help?” Not used to letting them? It’s time to change that. Put a reminder in your smartphone, or leave yourself notes where you’ll see them, that say, “Yes, thank you.” Accepting help could make life easier and give you more time. Think of tasks or errands that friends and neighbors could do: make a meal, mow the lawn, watch your kids while you’re at the doctor, or listen to how you’re doing.

Your energy probably is down from what you’re used to. But being active as much as you can actually gives you more energy. Plus, it burns off stress and feels good! Check with your doctor about the types of activities that are OK for you to do. You might also want to find a certified personal trainer who works with people who have breast cancer.

Give yourself an evening on your couch to watch a favorite comedy, pick up a funny book, or play board games. Laughter coaxes your body to relax, helps you deal better with stress, and may also ease pain, soothe stomachaches, and loosen tight muscles.

Sleep gives your body a chance to heal and recharge. If it’s hard to fall or stay asleep, try going to bed and waking up at the same time every day. Avoid heavy meals late at night, and turn off all screens 30 minutes before bed. Try to spend some time in natural light, whether you go outside during the day or sit in a sunny room. It primes your body clock to rest later on. If sleep stays a problem, let your doctor know.

Could you order your groceries online and have them sent to your home? Or send out your laundry? Might you be able to let some things go? Some cancer groups also deliver home-cooked meals or help with housecleaning for free.

Taking care with how you look can boost your mood. It’s a small treat for yourself, not a standard you have to live up to. Some women choose to wear a wig, turban, scarf, or hat. Or you might decide to embrace being temporarily bald. If you lose your eyebrows and eyelashes, and like to wear makeup, eye shadow and liner can enhance your features. You can also use false eyelashes. If you usually go to a nail salon, try an at-home mani-pedi.

You’ve probably heard you should “be positive” as you deal with cancer. But no one expects you to be cheerful all the time. It’s healthy to feel all your emotions, including  anger or fear -- and to have a safe place to talk about them with family, friends, your support group, and possibly a counselor. Doing so may help you let go of these feelings. If you get depressed or anxious, tell your doctor or counselor so you can get relief.

With doctor visits, treatments, and tests, you have a lot going on. How do you relax when you get home? You could meditate, pray, do yoga, enjoy a favorite hobby, or write in a journal. You might also want to take some time for yourself: Turn off your cellphone and all other screens in your house for even a few minutes each day for some peace and quiet.

Sex may be the last thing on your mind right now -- and that’s OK. Talk with your partner about what feels good to you, as well as when you feel too tired or want time to yourself. Remember that there are plenty of ways to be intimate without having sex. Kissing, touching each other, and massage can all help you and your partner stay close.

Friends will respond to your cancer in different ways. Some will offer strength, fun, and support. Spend as much time as you can with them. Others may feel scared or unsure of what to do, and vanish when you need them most.  If their absence hurts your feelings, tell them and talk about what would feel better.

Every cancer diagnosis comes with a pile of paperwork. This includes test results, treatment details, medical bills, and a list of medicines you’re taking. It’s a good idea to keep all these papers in one place. You may need them in the future. Put them into your filing cabinet or a binder, scan them into your computer, or put these papers into a box. Your partner or caregiver should know where these records are, too.