7 Sex Mistakes Men Make
Mistake 5: Expect Intercourse to Give Her an Orgasm
For 80% of women, intercourse alone won’t do the trick. Why not? Most sex positions don’t directly stimulate the clitoris.
There are other ways to pleasure her. “Women orgasm much more consistently from oral sex than from intercourse,” Kerner says. Also, try sex with the woman on top, or a vibrator made for couples to use during sex. “Men should feel comfortable, not threatened, with sex toys,” he says.
To help her hit the high note when you do have sex, take time to get her going before you make your entrance. “The closer women are when they start intercourse, the more likely they are to have an orgasm,” Barbach says.
Mistake 6: Skip the Seduction
Women like to be seduced. "Seduction is as important as, or sometimes more important than, technique,” Cooper says.
It helps to know what kind of turn-on your partner likes, whether it’s oral, visual, or mental, she says. “Does your partner like it when you talk dirty over the phone or text? Trace your finger slowly up her chest? Flirt with her at a bar?”
Also, if you like what you see, say so. "Let a woman know how desirable she is,” Barbach says.
Mistake 7: Focus on Ringing the Bell
Most women need clitoral stimulation to have an orgasm, but it's more complex than you may think.
Some men "don’t understand the anatomy of the clitoris,” Cooper says. It’s more than the small "button" you can see. Its nerve endings spread throughout the vulva and inside the vagina. All are potential pleasure points worth exploring.
“You can go back and forth,” Cooper says. Paying too much attention to the glans, at the top of the vulva, can take away from pleasure for some women. It's so sensitive, that too much stimulation can hurt.