By Lindsey PalmerIn case you had any doubt that taking charge can improve your sex life, now there's proof:
For women, being less passive in bed is associated with increased sexual satisfaction and a better ability to reach the big O, says a recent study in the journal Personal Relationships. Too shy to bust out in the bedroom? Sex expert Emma Taylor (a.k.a. Em), coauthor (with Lorelei Sharkey, a.k.a. Lo) of Buh Bye: The Ultimate Guide to Dumping and Getting Dumped, offers these tips for bashful...
Getting caught during a delicate moment, whether you’re solo or with a partner, is common.
“It’s best to address your embarrassment head-on,” says Carole Lieberman, MD, a psychiatrist in Beverly Hills. A light response can work wonders -- something like, “Oh, I thought I was going to have some private time here,” or, “We thought we were alone.”
Get caught by your kids? “Young children, in particular, may interpret sexual situations as Mommy and Daddy fighting, so it’s important to quickly let your child know that you are playing,” says Lieberman. Older children are more clued into what’s going on and respond better to, "We were showing our love for each other, and you'll understand better when you grow up.”
Your Partner Has a Fetish
If your partner makes a freaky request, ask yourself: Are you ashamed to do it? Is it unsafe? If the answer is no to both, “it’s worthwhile to be open-minded and willing to try it,” Lieberman says.
Before you start, discuss what it is you don’t like about the idea, and consider having a "safe word" that lets your partner know it’s time to stop. Knowing you can call a halt when you want to may even help you enjoy it.