Living Your Best With Prostate Cancer

Life goes on after a prostate cancer diagnosis, and often for a very long time. If your disease is still in the early stages and you've opted not to treat it, it may have little or even no effect on you. But there may be some adjustments to make to your life during treatment. Here's how you can live well even with prostate cancer.

Changes to Your Sex Life

Sex will be a little different if you have surgery to remove your prostate gland. It means you won’t ejaculate, though you can still have an orgasm. Trouble getting erections or having orgasms is also a risk after an operation or if you have radiation therapy.

You can work with your doctor to cut those risks. Start by asking about "nerve-sparing" surgery and more precise radiation therapy. You can ask about the success he’s had in protecting other men from these side effects.

If you do end up having problems after treatment, you’re not just out of luck. Keep in mind that for many men, the problems go away on their own once the body has time to heal. Medications, devices, penile implants, and couples counseling also can make your sex life satisfying again. But most of all, be patient with yourself.

Better Bladder Control

Prostate cancer and its treatment can give men trouble with their bladders. You might feel the urge to go to the bathroom all the time, not be able to go when you want to, have a weak stream, or leak in between trips to the toilet.

These side effects may go away soon after treatment, or they might linger for a while. Either way, you can take control of the problem.

  • Try Kegel exercises to strengthen the pelvic floor muscles that support your bladder. Kegels are helpful before treatment, as well. Ask your doctor how to do them.
  • Your doctor may prescribe medications. 
  • Pads in your underwear can catch leaks. You can also wear adult diapers, but it’s rare for the problem to be severe enough to need them.
  • "Condom catheters" go over your penis to catch the urine.
  • Surgery. There are different types depending on the cause of your problem.

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Get Comfortable With the Unknown

You can live a long time with prostate cancer, maybe even decades. If you catch and treat it early, you might even be able to cure it. This is a wonderful thing, but it does add uncertainty to your life.

You may not be able to know exactly what will happen, but you can change how you handle your feelings about it:

  • Get information. Ask your doctor how likely the cancer is to come back or to get worse, when it might happen, and signs you should watch for. 
  • Pay attention to follow-up care. This means getting the tests your doctor suggests and keeping all your medical appointments. You'll be more likely to notice any troubling signs before they're really serious.
  • Do what you can to let go of worry. Relaxation exercises, like deep breathing or meditation, may help you.
  • If you haven’t already, get your finances and other affairs in order. It will give you one less thing to worry about.

Find a New Normal

Cancer is a big life change. Work on accepting that things won’t be just as they always were. It can help you adjust to life with prostate cancer. Here are some things that might be different:

  • Body image. You may need to adjust how you see yourself or deal with changes in your self-esteem.
  • Identity. Some men feel that their "masculine" identity has changed as a result of the cancer.
  • New family roles. As you go through treatment and recovery, you may find that you can't do everything you used to do at home.

Some of these changes may work themselves out over time. For instance, as you recover, you may be able to resume your activities around the house. Others, such as identity and self-esteem issues, could benefit from talking to a professional, people close to you, or other survivors.

WebMD Medical Reference Reviewed by Louise Chang, MD on June 07, 2018

Sources

SOURCES:

UK National Health Service: "Prostate Cancer."

Urology Care Foundation: "Surgery."

AARP: "Sex and Intimacy."

University of Texas M.D. Anderson Cancer Center: "Prostate Cancer Treatment."

University of Michigan Comprehensive Cancer Center: "Restoring Intimacy."

Prostate Cancer Foundation: "Erectile Dysfunction."

American Cancer Society: "Managing Incontinence for Men With Cancer" and "Living With Uncertainty: The Fear of Cancer Recurrence."

Prostate Cancer UK: "Living with and after prostate cancer."

American College of Clinical Oncology: "Follow-up Care for Prostate Cancer;" "Sexuality and Cancer Treatment: Men;" and "Family Life."

University of Michigan Health System: "Stress Management When You Have Cancer."

Harrington, J. Oncology Nursing Forum, March 2009.

National Cancer Institute: "Self Image and Sexuality," "Family Issues after Treatment."

Maliski, S. Qualitative Health Research, December 2008.

Bokhour, B. Communication & Medicine, 2007.

National Caregivers Library: "Coping Within the Family."

Cancer Support Community: "Managing Emotions."

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