Getting Past the Guilt of Type 2
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Katie DearmanGetting my diagnosis was a negative in the beginning in that I spent so much time being down about it and beating myself up over it. Sure, I wish I would have tackled it sooner and done something about it sooner. But I didn't. That's in the past, but I've done something now and that's what counts.
When my doctor told me I had type 2 diabetes full blown, I remember feeling a huge sense of guilt that I had done this to myself. I'm responsible for this. Some people can do it on their own, completely. I'm not one of those. I need accountability. If you can do it with at least one other person, that's very helpful because of the support and encouragement you can give each other.
The very first thing I had to do was understand what diabetes was. I started making better food choices, learning the different foods and the effect of the sugar on me. When I started getting off the sugar and how I stated feeling so much better and then I would eat something really, really sweet and I would actually feel the sugar dump, that was a horrible feeling. I think I'd been eating so much sugar that I never got to that dump part. I don't know. But it was really an awful feeling.
When I started out walking I couldn't go very far. We're talking couch to like end of the driveway and I was out of breath. And I was embarrassed to go out and walk. So I walked in front of the TV, I walked the circle in our house. So from there it grew. I started going outside a little bit. And again, I could not go very far, but I kept increasing it and increasing it.
I've actually jogged. I mean Katie Dearman has jogged out in public where people can see me. I didn't realize how bad I felt until I felt better. And when I started feeling better, oh my gosh, I wanted more and more and more. That is a huge motivator.
My life has gone from zero to 150 in energy, in being positive, and being excited about being alive.
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