Choosing To Be Happy
Strategies for Happiness: 7 Steps to Becoming a Happier Person
Happiness Strategy # 1: Don't Worry, Choose Happy continued...
Tom G. Stevens, PhD, titled his book with the bold assertion, You Can
Choose to Be Happy. "Choose to make happiness a top goal," Stevens tells
WebMD. "Choose to take advantage of opportunities to learn how to be happy. For
example, reprogram your beliefs and values. Learn good self-management skills,
good interpersonal skills, and good career-related skills. Choose to be in
environments and around people that increase your probability of happiness. The
persons who become the happiest and grow the most are those who also make truth
and their own personal growth primary values."
In short, we may be born with a happiness "set point," as Lykken calls it,
but we are not stuck there. Happiness also depends on how we manage our
emotions and our relationships with others.
Jon Haidt, author of The Happiness Hypothesis, teaches positive
psychology. He actually assigns his students to make themselves happier during
"They have to say exactly what technique they will use," says Haidt, a
professor at the University of Virginia, in Charlottesville. "They may choose
to be more forgiving or more grateful. They may learn to identify negative
thoughts so they can challenge them. For example, when someone crosses you, in
your mind you build a case against that person, but that's very damaging to
relationships. So they may learn to shut up their inner lawyer and stop
building these cases against people."
Once you've decided to be happier, you can choose strategies for achieving
happiness. Psychologists who study happiness tend to agree on ones like
Happiness Strategy #2: Cultivate Gratitude
In his book, Authentic Happiness, University of Pennsylvania
psychologist Martin Seligman encourages readers to perform a daily "gratitude
exercise." It involves listing a few things that make
them grateful. This shifts people away from bitterness and despair, he says,
and promotes happiness.
Happiness Strategy #3: Foster Forgiveness
Holding a grudge and nursing grievances can affect physical as well as mental
health, according to a rapidly growing body of research. One way to curtail
these kinds of feelings is to foster forgiveness. This reduces the power of bad
events to create bitterness and resentment, say Michael McCullough and Robert
Emmons, happiness researchers who edited The Psychology of